The stupidest thing you can do is cheat thinking that it will fix your problems

Different People, Same Problems
Someone once told me that the stupidest thing you can do is cheat thinking that it will fix your problems. When I asked why, this person gave me some great advice. They said that many of your relationship frustrations in your current marriage are also due in part to your personality. Barring abused spouses who are clearly in another category and should get away as soon as they can, most run-of-the-mill marriages have their fair share of conflict, disagreement, anger, eruptions, frustration, and contempt. If this gets so bad that you think that someone else can understand and comfort you (say, that successful wealthy,

seemingly calm, tall, dark, and handsome friend), then you have crossed the line into a fantasy and an emotional affair. The problem is that you are comparing your real-world situation (being mad at your spouse) with a fantasy (he’s perfect and I want him to hold me and tell me everything is alright). As my friend mentioned, all your anger at your spouse also has to do with your baggage and personality flaws, not just theirs. So, after the initial lustful passion of your affair wears off and you have to face the consequences of what you have done, you will find that you have very similar or even identical issues with your lover as you had with your spouse. If you struggled to communicate, you still will. If you got mad that he didn’t tidy up, chances are, you’ll still be griping about the same things. If you feel that he ignores you and doesn’t satisfy you in the bedroom, after the passion has waned, those same grievances will come up. This point can be summed up by the old saying that is tried and true:

The grass is always greener on the other side. If you think about this old saying, you will realize the philosophy behind it. It is greener, until you walk over to see it. Then the grass where you were standing looks greener and the grass you are on now looks brown. Never envy or covet or fantasize about another person. They are just as screwed up as you, and no, things will not be perfect if you end up having an affair with them.

Collateral Damage
Of course you will have all sorts of personal grievances and frustrations as you cheat, but how can I not mention how your selfish actions will affect those you love? While you are deep into the obsession and fantasy, your feelings of responsibility and duty are muted. You may not even be able to clearly picture in your mind how your actions may hurt others. But, even if you have to memorize it as factual information and are unable to feel due to emotional numbness, rest assured that your actions have lasting effects on those you love and care about. The first biggest collateral damage is your kids or children around you. If your marriage breaks up because you are caught cheating, your children lose their home and their security and will have suffered what the American Academy of Pediatrics refers to as an adverse childhood experience that could set them up for a lifetime of depression, anxiety, and other harmful issues. Yes, I’m telling the truth you don’t want to hear:

ruining your marriage before your kids are 18 will scar them for life. But your children are not the only who can suffer. If the other man or woman has children, then they will be the ones suffering an adverse childhood experience. If you fantasize about kicking mom out and being the new Mrs., you need to know that the children of your lover will always see you as the other woman, or as the person their parent cheated with and ruined their family. If they are able to forgive it in the first place, it would be a miracle. More often than not, you will struggle to gain their acceptance, and their grudges and anger toward you will reverberate into all future relationships. Children are not the only ones who can be hurt by an affair. Your parents and other family members will be sorely disappointed in your choices, as well as all of your friends and the community at large, which brings me to my next point.

source http://tasboy.com/the-stupidest-thing-you-can-do-is-cheat-thinking-that-it-will-fix-your-problems/