8 Reasons to Text Him First
In spite of what you may have read online or heard from friends, texting a guy first can have a lot of benefits. Here are the top eight reasons why you can—and perhaps even should —text him first.
1. It will make honesty the policy right from the get-go.
2. You will show courage and confidence.
3. Your date may not be good at taking hints.
4. He might be waiting for you to text him first.
5. You’ll take control instead of sitting idly by.
6. You’ll spend less time stressing and more time enjoying each other.
7. Your interest in each other won’t last forever.
8. It can be a turn-on.
Continue scrolling for in-depth discussions of the reasons above, and have your phone at the ready for that first text!
1. You Are Encouraging Honesty Early On
After a date, there is nothing wrong with sending a guy a simple message like: “Hey, I just wanted to say that I had a good time tonight and I hope we can do it again.”
He probably feels the same way, and if he doesn’t, then who cares? At least now you know. All your cards are on the table, and if he’s a decent person, he will respond in kind by showing you all of his.
Instead of playing a guessing game, you can take the first step to establish openness and honesty early on in the relationship.
After all, if you start out by playing silly mind games, then don’t be surprised if the games continue once you’re past the dating stage. The things that you do when you’re first getting to know each other can set the tone for the rest of your relationship.
2. You Are Displaying Courage and Confidence
Want to demonstrate that you’re different from other women right off the bat? Have some social courage, and don’t be afraid to ask for what you want. This doesn’t mean that you have to be pushy or weird, but it does mean that you have to be upfront. It means that you’re not afraid to text him first if that’s what the situation calls for.
Lots of women seem to have the erroneous belief that men will be turned off by women who are obvious and upfront. This is not true in most cases. An open and vulnerable woman (or man, really) is hard to come by. If anything, your guy will probably be impressed.
Some guys may seem aloof, but really it’s just that they don’t take your hints well!
3. Your Date May Not Take Hints Well
Years ago, a girl pretended that she didn’t like me because she was afraid of rejection. She acted disinterested and even went so far as to be kind of cold towards me (or so it seemed to me).
Since I was bad at taking hints, I totally missed all the signs that she was into me and wanted me to make a move. It was only weeks later, when she was honest with me about how she felt, that it even dawned on me that she was interested. Because she ignored me, I had thought that she actually disliked me!
Some guys are just bad at taking hints, myself included. No matter how long you wait for them to contact you, they may never make a move because they simply think that you’re not interested.
4. He Might Be Waiting for You to Text Him First
Generally, I agree that a guy should text a girl first for practical reasons. It’s what is socially accepted, and most women are just not willing to put themselves out there like that. More importantly, most women prefer to be led by the guys they date, not the other way around.
However, not all guys got the memo on this one. For reasons of his own, your love interest may be waiting for you to text him first. It’s possible that he doesn’t want to bother you. Maybe he’s been rejected by women in the past who accused him of being “creepy” merely for showing interest.
There are plenty of reasons why a great guy might be hesitant to text you first.
5. You Won’t Just Be Sitting There Waiting for Something to Happen
Because it takes a certain amount of guts to show your interest upfront, many women avoid doing it. They avoid texting first, asking to spend more time together, and saying the first “I love you.”
While this can work out just fine if you find a guy who has fewer social fears than you do, it means that you have given up much of the control over the progress of the relationship. You’re sitting there waiting for things to happen instead of
making them happen.
If that’s what you want, then great. But don’t complain if your relationships go nowhere.
The sooner you get the initial texting out of the way, the sooner you can get to the fun stuff. |
6. You Get to Spend Less Time Agonizing and More Time Enjoying Each Other
When you get right down to it, someone has to contact someone eventually to get things going.
Instead of “waiting at least three days” or, worse, sitting there and agonizing indefinitely about when this cool person will text you first, just break the ice already. Life is too short.
7. Romantic Interest Has a Shelf Life
It’s a very unromantic thing to say, but it’s true: Romantic interest in another person has a shelf life. If you delay acting on your budding feelings, things will cool down very quickly.
If both of you are avoiding texting each other first out of a fear of vulnerability, eventually you’ll start to forget all of the good feelings you felt when you saw each other. Your fond memories will become tepid, and both of you will start to question why you liked the other person in the first place.
So strike while the iron is hot! Don’t delay things so much. If he’s taking too long to text you, then text him first and get things going.
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8. Texting a Guy First Can Actually Be a Turn-On
Believe it or not, many guys really like it when girls text first. Being confident is a big turn-on, and sending the first text takes confidence! Unless you’re sending slews of unanswered messages at a time, consistently sending the first text can actually be a big turn-on for guys. It shows that you’re interested and you know what you want.
Besides, for a shy guy, it can be really refreshing to have a girl send the first text. It takes a lot of pressure off of him and will instantly make him more comfortable with you.
source http://tasboy.com/its-never-bad-idea-to-be-the-one-to-make-a-move-on-someone-3/
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