Friday, December 20, 2019

You can easily be dumped if you carry this in your personality

7 personality that may distroy you

1. The Awkward One
The awkward one may simply be shy, and you might find, with a little patience, they soon open up and become easier to get along with. Yet some awkward people will always be awkward. They resist every social cue; from being unable to make small talk, to rolling their eyes if they don’t agree with another person. They can make you feel exceedingly uncomfortable if there’s no apparent reason for their inability to be friendly. Of course it’s possible they have Aspergers or similar; in that case their behavior is understandable. But some people simply can’t make the effort, so once you’ve ascertained that things aren’t going to change, stop wasting your energy on them.

2. The Controller
The controlling person is one who is fearful with a low self-esteem. They will try to control you in order to shore up their own lack of confidence. If they can control their environment and the people around them, including their partners, children, and friends, it gives them a sense of, well, control. And it won’t matter how much you try to please them, there will always be some failing on your part.

They will insist on telling you what to do, disguised as ‘advice’. From your appearance to your career to your relationships. You can’t ever satisfy them because they cannot be placated by other people; they need to look inward and admit to their own fears and insecurity. Often the controller is a partner or a parent. You need to be firm to this person, even if you have fallen into the habit of doing their bidding. Assert yourself in order to retain your sanity. Occasionally, a controller will break down and you get a glimpse of their vulnerabilities. Maybe they will soften, maybe they won’t.

3. The Conversation HijackerHijacker
This is the person who can turn any conversation around to themselves. And we all do it from time to time. The key is finding the balance between offering your personal experience of the topic to taking over the whole conversation. There are those who do this constantly. It really is all about them. If you have a friend who does this, they aren’t any friend of yours. You are simply there to be their sounding board.

4. The Emotional Vampire
It can be hard to define an emotional vampire because often they seem perfectly normal, or maybe slightly on the negative side of normal. However, after you have left their company, the feeling of relief is very strong. If they have been in your home, you might feel the urge to open the windows to let the breeze cleanse the atmosphere. An emotional vampire sucks the energy out of you like a Harry Potter Dementor. You feel drained and washed out when they leave. Avoid at all costs.

5. The Needy Victim
Similar to the emotional vampire, the needy victim wants your energy and your sympathy. What they probably don’t want is your advice or suggestions how they might help themselves in a practical way. Sure they’ll let you ‘help’ but usually they will simply carry on along their own path. They are masochists who enjoy being one of life’s victims. You will be left irritated and frustrated by their excuses.

6. The Critical One
The controller and the critical one share similar qualities. The critical one can’t bear to see any one happy, so they will pick holes in your achievement or your triumph. They will undermine you at every turn. A telling sign of a critic is that they will gossip about other people in a judgmental manner. You can bet your life that, as soon as they have the opportunity, they’ll be talking about you in the same way. Meanwhile, when you are with them, they will ask you if you think you could do better, or make different choices, or compare you to someone else.

7. The Dramatist
This person lurches from drama to drama and insists on regaling you with every detail. Often repeatedly. You start to wonder if they enjoy their crises. And you would be right. Getting into disagreements, usually with people like service providers, storekeepers, etc… people who aren’t close to them, makes them feel validated. “I am the customer and I have a complaint. So you must pay attention to me.”

Mrs W. took her children to a shoe store to have their feet measured up for new shoes. When they walked in there was only one assistant on her knees, tidying up a display. The assistant said, “Sorry, I won’t keep you a minute.” Then she said, “Would you bring your children over here so I can measure them?” Mrs W. was furious at being treated in such an off-hand manner. “She should have got up and come to us,” she fumed later. And kept on about the girl’s rudeness. And on and on, until she had wrung every atom of drama out of the situation.

You and I would probably only noticed the girl’s smile and her easy manner with the children. The fact that we had to walk a few yards across the store wouldn’t have even caused a blip on our radar. But, when you are looking out for slights and insults, you’ll find them.



source http://tasboy.com/you-can-easily-be-dumped-if-you-carry-this-in-your-personality/

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